"While he's chasing someone, let's make him run through a mob where he gets knocked down over and over again. Is Connor getting up off the ground? Let's have someone else knock him back down." Seriously, one guy takes a swing at me from 10 fucking feet away, and Connor, a fucking trained Native American assassin, loses his bearings enough so that he lays dazed and fucking confused on the ground for a good 5 fucking seconds before starting to get up, only to have someone else throw a punch in his general direction to repeat the process. Note that during this entire time of getting knocked down and back up again I have absolutely zero control over him. I'm basically sitting watching a fucking movie as I get more pissed off. Who in their fucking right mind ever thought it would be a good thing to put sequences where you have no control into a video game? Oh shit, just got knocked down, let's wait 10 whole fucking seconds before I can even do anything with the controller again. It's like you have to hope Zeus himself on Mt. Olympus is watching out for you and parts the sea of assholes just waiting to knock you down and start this 10 fucking minute process of no control while you watch your USELESS assassin being pushed around by Mr. Pushypants with a British coat and stupid sneer.
And even if I managed to make it past that clusterfuck of ragequit (no, I couldn't just parkour my way across the rooftops, it's a chase/tackle mission, so fuck you), I can't even look at a building without Connor wanting to scale halfway up the fucking thing before I can tell him to fuck off and keep running. "Let's make the climbing and running the same button, just to piss everyone off." Great fucking job, it's working. I've had to resort to walking past building corners because Connor's got it in his tiny little brain that just because I'm running I'll want to leap up and start humping the side of a building.
And even if I do somehow find myself in the right place at the right time, it's like they forgot that people will be playing this who haven't designed the game, so they might actually need you to tell them what the fucking objective is, or what the fucking constraints are. I must have walked around a courtyard I was trying to get into that was guarded on all sides trying to escort Mr. Sam Fucking Adams himself for 30 minutes before I said "fuck it all" and just fought my way in. Turns out that's what you were supposed to do the whole fucking time. Except they just fucking told me to not fight any guards or I'd fail the mission. FOR FUCKS SAKE, AT LEAST TELL ME TO MY FACE WHEN YOU'RE GOING TO FUCK ME OVER.
Gods fucking dammit, a game hasn't made me this pissed off in a long time.
PS - Fuck the horseback riding. The horses do not want to go where you want them to go, get hung up on every little thing, and can't cross a fucking stream unless you're near a designated choke point on the banks.
This post has been edited by andrewthewookie: 02 November 2012 - 12:56 AM