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#1 Wolfwood

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 06:11 AM

Every time a new game, movie or show sequel/prequel/remake/reboot/refuck or whatever comes out, you can be guaranteed that just about god damn near everyone will bitch and moan about how "Hollywood has run out of ideas" and "Games are just repetitive shooters that dominate the market" And I'm fucking sick of it, all of it.

Seriously, shut the fuck up, not a single, solitary sentient creature on this planet gives a single drop of ball sweat about your inane hypocritical whining, not a drop.
"But why?" You didn't ask, because everyone wants to have an opinion, fucking everyone has to stand tall and pronounce how "Edgy" and "Controversial" their opinion is by stating that they "Hate all new movies/games/television" because it isn't older movies/games/television.

Ask fucking anyone, ask me! Fuck, I'll do the same thing, ask me about my favorite games, I'll give you a list with the bulk being form the 90-00's such as Civilization, Warcraft, Mechwarrior and Mechcommander etc, all those games, and more, kick your ass out your eye sockets, their that awesome.

Ask someone 20 years older than me, they'll probably talk about Kings Quest, the Ultima Series and other early PC games, ask someone ten years younger then me and you get the point.
So, what point am I trying to make exactly?

No one is allowed to complain about unoriginality in media ever again, ever, no, not even then.

Why? Because you all fucking love it, you love every half-ass sequel and reboot because you hate anything not familiar, all of you.
Just look at some of the new movies and games coming out.

Halo 4, which is more like Halo 8
The dozens of goddamn sports games, Madden/FIFA/NBA/WTF 13
Paranormal Activity fucking FOUR
And the metric fuck ton of movies being re-released in 3D because knuckle dragging morons will pay to watch the same movie again, but with a headache.

Seriously, did you people even WATCH Paranormal Activity? That movie is a black hole of suckage, and you people fucking raved about it, I shouldn't even have to tell you this, it shouldn't of had to come to this, the movies aren't scary, they aren't interesting and you can see the ending from a mile away.

Remember the trailer for the first one? Where they recorded paid actors movie goers reactions as the entire studio theater jumped and screamed? Remember not doing that when you saw the movie? The first jump scare? Maybe after the third jump scare they did, I just turned the volume down so the orchestral sting didn't jar the shit out of me.

And now there's a FOURTH fucking sequel coming out, and I'm not just picking on movies for just brain-shitting whatever sequel they can birth from their loins, the game industry just took it way to god damn far.

I'm not going to rag on the games in particular, but think about it, Halo fucking 8, don't give me this buillshit and call it "4" it's not, this is the 8th Halo game released including the spin-offs.
It's not just popular titles like Halo, Call of Duty does it, hell, the only thing Activision DOES anymore is make shitty sequels to already lackluster games that people paid money for.

And you people will buy and watch the same games and movies time and time again, then cry when nothing new is every created? Fuck off, this is all your fault, you were told this would happen, if you give something money, it will grow, when you give it all of your money, it will grow, and when it's grown to big to fit in the house and starts wrecking all your shit, you're not allowed to get all huffy and puffy about it, it's your fucking fault.

And there were a bunch of other games you could have played, this example has been used to death, so eat me, I don't fucking care.

Okami was a game no one bought.

Fucking no one bought it, it sold about 200,000 copies, which isn't a lot, that's piss fucking poor for how great that game is, the game is a work of art, a great cast of characters you actually give a shit about, a detailed and thought out world and an amazing story.

And no one gave a shit.

Another example that has been used far to much is Psychonaughts, another amazing game that no one gave a shit about, despite rave reviews if your the kind of person who still reads reviews, and no one bothered to play it, because everyone was to busy feeding the sequels until they got to big.

Scott Pilgram Vs The World? Barely turned a profit, good (Not great) movie that may actually deserve a sequel and it gets shit canned.

Fucking awesome.

So no, you don't get to complain anymore, you sit there and you fucking deal with it, it's not their fault, it's yours, you did this, The Man didn't run out of ideas, you just didn't listen to their ideas.
And really, if you want to look for great games or movies, go back in time, and skip over most of the indie shit.

Seriously, I've watched a ton of indie movies and played a ton of Indie games, and basically all of them suck, all of them.
I'm sick of people giving indie filmmakers and developers leeway just for being small-time, if you and a couple of your friends made the shittiest movie ever to blight the world, it would probably slide as "not great, but what can you say, it's just 3 or 4 guys with a video camera and basic effects, for that, it's pretty good" Because everyone has to gargle the indie mouthwash as much as possible to appear "Relevant" to younger generations.

The only, and I mean ONLY "Decent" indie movie I have ever seen was Six String Samurai, and of course, barely anyone has seen it, it's a good movie, not great, but good, and if you can find it, I would check it out, but you won't, you'll go watch Spiderman 12 and bitch about how unoriginal it is.

I'm not going on a rant about how "Everything new sucks, man" No, if I did that, I'd be a total bitch, instead, I'll just leave you with this.

Most anything "Indie" is crap and not worth you time, and if it does suck, which it almost always will, give them no quarter.

Life is hard, you will die alone, and your indie movie sucks the chrome off a bumper.

The End.

Also...

Why is it that people still go to shitty stores to shop for the holidays? Why? Why the fuck would you do this?

What's the point? Did you miss the 'Holyfuckingshitlookatallthegreaetdealsonlinemygoditslikeavirtualblowjobbutformywalletbutalsome" bus? I guess I understand, who wouldn't want to drive down to the store and some ungodly hour, wait in line, shamble around the crammed store like cattle, pick out your shit, wait in line again to leave and go home, all before lunch?

Fucking no one, that's who, it's not like you're saving money, even if what you wanted to buy was 10 dollars less at the store, you STILL have to pay for the gas to get their and come back, and everyone I've ever seen to this shitty ritual stops somewhere for breakfast.

You know what I do? I roll out of bed around 8 on a Saturday, eat my shitty breakfeast, dick around on the internet, and whenever I get around to it, I'll buy whatever shit I feel like for my family who doesn't really want it, and wait about 3 days for it to get here, wrap it up, light it on fire and catapult it through their window.

Fucking love the holidays.

Speaking of holidays.

Why the fuck is their Christmas shit up before Thanksgiving? Does no one give a flying fuck about Thanksgiving anymore? Why does Christmas eat up October, November and December? God damn hog...

Also, Halloween is shitty now.

#2 Zombie Afroshot

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 07:19 AM

Games are games, people hate.

Also Halloween is still awesome.

First.

Games are games, people hate.

Also Halloween is still awesome.

First.

Games are games, people hate.

Also Halloween is still awesome.

First.
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#3 Rotozip2

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 10:01 AM

*tear drops* Beautiful, absolutely beautiful. Posted Image

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#4 andrewthewookie

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 10:39 AM

Also, Halloween is shitty now.

Seems fine to me.

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#5 Antonious

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 12:08 PM

Allow me to bitch about bitching so people quit their bitching as I am the only one worthy to bitch.

Edited by Antonious, 02 October 2012 - 12:09 PM.

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#6 GeoAkuna

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 04:11 PM

Borderlands 2 is really good...
Okami was a beautiful game.
Another Scott Pilgrim movie didn't happen because the original comic book series finished. (and both the movie and the comics are underrated)
I do agree with you.
Good rant is good.

#7 XxLOPERSxX

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 04:12 PM

Nice rant, and you definetely got the Christmas thing from AVGN's Bullshit series :)
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#8 The Bacon Man

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 04:37 PM

But CoD 27 has so many new features!

#9 ExcellentStudent

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 05:00 PM

Rant Rating: :tup: :tup: :tup: :tup: :tup: :tup:

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#10 Wolfwood

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 07:45 PM

Allow me to bitch about bitching so people quit their bitching as I am the only one worthy to bitch.


Exactly.

Borderlands 2 is really good...
Okami was a beautiful game.
Another Scott Pilgrim movie didn't happen because the original comic book series finished. (and both the movie and the comics are underrated)
I do agree with you.
Good rant is good.


Borderlands 2 was indeed good, it has it's problems, though.

And no sequel to Scott Pilgrim because the book series finished? I've seen shittier reasons to make a sequel, it deserved a sequel, it had serious potential, though it would have been difficult.

I've never read the comics, but I do agree that the movie didn't deserve what it got, true it wasn't perfect, the story had the pacing of a man having a seizure, but it still deserved something.

#11 kingJurzy

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 07:52 PM

And the metric fuck ton of movies being re-released in 3D because knuckle dragging morons will pay to watch the same movie again, but with a headache.


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#12 tallsmallboy44

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 08:17 PM

I hate 3D movies.

The idea of 3D TV makes me queasy.

fuck yolo
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#13 newwestswag

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 08:18 PM

Wolfwood how long does it take you to write rants? they are just so beautiful. And I do agree with this whole rant.

#14 REDCOBRA

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 09:45 PM

The issue is that , the reactions of games,movies and tv can go three ways

"Wow , that was a unique experience I have never had before"

" That was pretty good , i've seen it before, but it was good"

" OMG they are un-original , they stole that from that show/game and it's the same as the previous one"


A movie to get the first is really goddamn hard to make and many times it is just a money pit ( keep in mind the payout is HUGE. A movie to get the second reaction is easy to make and it turns the best profit. And a movie that gets a reaction like the last one happens A LOT but it still makes money. All of these things are made with 1 goal in mind , MONEY $$$. The companies who make them want minimum risk. Going out on a limb and making something really unique is risky . Making something unoriginal is less risky. These companies cater to the "people", people come out of the theater with what they wanted and expected.( many "people" are dumbasses by the way, just because you find it stupid doesn't mean they will) People who go out to the movies don't want to see a "unique heartfelt drama with dynamic characters" they want to see a " raunchy comedy filled with action scenes of shit getting blown up" movie.

Edited by REDCOBRA, 02 October 2012 - 11:46 PM.

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#15 Titan429

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 10:59 PM

Your rant is awesome and you should feel awesome

#16 Wolfwood

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Posted 03 October 2012 - 02:01 AM

The issue is that , the reactions of games,movies and tv can go three ways

"Wow , that was a unique experience I have never had before"

" That was pretty good , i've seen it before, but it was good"

" OMG they are un-original , they stole that from that show/game and it's the same as the previous one"


A movie to get the first is really goddamn hard to make and many times it is just a money pit ( keep in mind the payout is HUGE. A movie to get the second reaction is easy to make and it turns the best profit. And a movie that gets a reaction like the last one happens A LOT but it still makes money. All of these things are made with 1 goal in mind , MONEY $$. The companies who make them want minimum risk. Going out on a limb and making something really unique is risky . Making something unoriginal is less risky. These companies cater to the "people", people come out of the theater with what they wanted and expected.( many "people" are dumbasses by the way, just because you find it stupid doesn't mean they will) People who go out to the movies don't want to see a "unique heartfelt drama with dynamic characters" they want to see a " raunchy comedy filled with action scenes of shit getting blown up" movie.


They make the most money because that's what people WANT to see.

Completely ignore the fact that the movie sucks donkey dicks, people paid to see it, people paid to see every other movie like it, their going to keep catering to what people want, which is shit, and then people bitch about it, even though they just keep doing it.

Kind of reminds me of the definition of insanity.

#17 cockerpunk

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Posted 03 October 2012 - 10:00 AM

thanksgiving > halloween > christmas
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#18 ShadowZero

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Posted 03 October 2012 - 08:08 PM

Halloween is probably my favorite holiday...

Halloween parties, slutty women at the halloween parties, yeah.

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#19 Wolfwood

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Posted 04 October 2012 - 12:10 AM

The problem i have with Halloween is one simple thing that makes Halloween, Halloween.

Nothing is allowed to be scary.

When I was a kid, I fucking loved Halloween, and every year it scared the shit out of me, I actually remember one year, I was 8 and I was walking up to someones home, and some dickwad jumped out of the bushes in a Werewolf costume.

It seems rather silly now, but as a kid, that scared the fuck out of me, if you do that today, someone calls the cops, you just aren't allowed to be scary, parents don't want their children dressing up as demons, ghosts and monsters, it's all Princesses, Cartoon Characters and other shitty, not scary things.
Sure, the entire point of the holiday is to sell candy, but it's supposed to be scary, but every helicopter mom and dad can't have their ugly child scared, it might upset them, I don't know, maybe I'm the only one who loved being scared on Halloween, maybe I'm the only one who doesn't want Halloween to just be "Go outside in your Bob the Builder costume, walk to house, go up to house, receive candy, walk to next house, repeat"

Oh well, guess I just have to grow up I suppose, but I refuse, If I'm going to get diabetes, I'm going to have fucking fun with it.

Edited by Wolfwood, 04 October 2012 - 12:12 AM.


#20 REDCOBRA

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Posted 04 October 2012 - 02:41 AM

http://www.cracked.c...-everybody.html

#5 the reason halloween has always sucked for me , My parents made me check my candy and throw out all the "sketchy" ones and by the end of checking it, i was left with like 5 pieces of really shitty candy.

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#21 tallsmallboy44

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Posted 04 October 2012 - 02:23 PM

Children today are too sheltered.

Parents don't let their children do shit anymore, and everything is "bad" or will "scar" the children. Seriously! Remember when you would fuck up, and your dad would get the belt out. Now, kids get a "tsk tsk" and go on with their day being wild and out of controll, because a spanking will "emotionally scar" them.

fuck yolo
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#22 A&MBaller

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 08:13 PM

Children today are too sheltered.

Parents don't let their children do shit anymore, and everything is "bad" or will "scar" the children. Seriously! Remember when you would fuck up, and your dad would get the belt out. Now, kids get a "tsk tsk" and go on with their day being wild and out of controll, because a spanking will "emotionally scar" them.


This.

By the way this rant was pretty good.

#23 tallsmallboy44

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Posted 05 October 2012 - 08:19 PM

By the way this rant was pretty good.

I got a limitless off topic with the Halloween thing.

fuck yolo
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#24 ExcellentStudent

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Posted 06 October 2012 - 07:23 PM

http://www.cracked.com/article_19432_5-people-who-screwed-things-up-everybody.html

#5 the reason halloween has always sucked for me , My parents made me check my candy and throw out all the "sketchy" ones and by the end of checking it, i was left with like 5 pieces of really shitty candy.

That guy's a massive cockblock

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#25 Orange Chicken

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Posted 21 October 2012 - 02:19 AM

Them hipsters and their mentality that agreeing with society is obviously uncool and unoriginal. But there are now so many of them. So...its mainstream to be hipster. So you are a *hipster* if you are not the hipster, making you mainstream. But not. Oh dear god.

But no, bitches will always be bitching.

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#26 PeanutWing

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Posted 15 November 2012 - 03:44 PM

Hipster :dodgy:




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